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I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Breakfast
Drink
Comedy
Must
More quotes by W. C. Fields
It's a wonderful thing, the D.T.'s. You can travel the world in a couple of hours. You see some mighty funny and curious things that come in assorted colors.
W. C. Fields
I ad lib most of my dialogue. If I did remember my lines, it would be too bad for me.
W. C. Fields
My heart is a bargain today. Will you take it?
W. C. Fields
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
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Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar.
W. C. Fields
The Punkwat twins! Brentwood is the world's smallest giant, whilst his brother, Elwood, is the largest midget in the world. They baffle science!
W. C. Fields
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it.
W. C. Fields
Somebody's been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!
W. C. Fields
After two days in the hospital, I turn to the nurse.
W. C. Fields
California is the only state in the union where you can fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.
W. C. Fields
I like children - fried.
W. C. Fields
No doubt exists that all women are crazy it's only a question of degree.
W. C. Fields
It's what you do that counts and not what you say therefore I fired my press agent.
W. C. Fields
I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know.
W. C. Fields
Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
W. C. Fields
Never mind what I told you - you do as I tell you.
W. C. Fields
What a gorgeous day. What effulgent sunshine. It was a day of this sort the McGillicuddy brothers murdered their mother with an axe.
W. C. Fields
I've been barbecued, stewed, screwed, tattooed, and fried by people claiming to be my friends. The human race has gone backward, not forward, since the days we were apes swinging through the trees.
W. C. Fields
The work I'm doing on the screen differs from that of anyone else. My comedy is of a peculiar nature...no writers have been developed along the lines of my type of comedy and this is why I sometimes have differences with writers, supervisors and directors alike.
W. C. Fields
I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.
W. C. Fields
