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I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Experts
Prison
State
Occupied
Father
Expert
Science
Applied
States
Chair
Electricity
Chairs

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I'm looking for loopholes.
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Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
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I never voted for anybody. I always voted against.
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So long as the presence of death lurks with anyone who goes through the simple act of swallowing, I will make mine whiskey.
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I like my films to influence the audience. Even if it means tripping their aged grandparents with a cane when they get home.
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A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell.
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Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad.
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It was a marriage of convenience, as my father had a blister on his big toe and couldn't travel far to find a girl.
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If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.
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If I had my life to live over again, I'd live over a saloon.
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All my available funds are completely tied up in cash.
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I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m.
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Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil.
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There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
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Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
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Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
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