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It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Sucker
Morally
Morality
Allow
Wrong
Funny
Keep
Money
Scams
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Women are like elephants to me. I like to look at them, but I wouldn't want to own one.
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I like my films to influence the audience. Even if it means tripping their aged grandparents with a cane when they get home.
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Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
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It's what you do that counts and not what you say therefore I fired my press agent.
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No man is boss in his own home, but he can make up for it, he thinks, by making a dog play dead.
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Remember, Lady Godiva put all she had on a horse and she lost her shirt!
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Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
W. C. Fields
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
W. C. Fields
Some people are born losers others acquire the knack gradually.
W. C. Fields
I would rather be living in Philadelphia.
W. C. Fields
Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.
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Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad.
W. C. Fields
Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.
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There are seven natural openings in the head and body. A lawyer is the only human being with eight. The extra one is a slot to store money in, should his bank be unable to hold all of it.
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I always made up my own acts built them out of my knowledge and observation of real life. I'd had wonderful opportunities to study people and every time I went out on the stage I tried to show the audience some bit of true human nature.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. Fields
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. Fields
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
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I don't know why I ever come in here. The flies get the best of everything.
W. C. Fields
I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
W. C. Fields