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I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Thinking
Philadelphia
Sunday
Witty
Spent
Comedy
Year
Years
Think
More quotes by W. C. Fields
I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.
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Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
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The Punkwat twins! Brentwood is the world's smallest giant, whilst his brother, Elwood, is the largest midget in the world. They baffle science!
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The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to sign me for the silent movies.
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I didn't squawk about the steak, dear. I merely said I didn't see that old horse that used to be tethered outside here.
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The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
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I note the derogatory rumors concerning the use of alcoholic stimulants and lavish living. It is the penalty of greatness.
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Sex isn't necessary. You don't die without it, but you can die having it.
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The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his .
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I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
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All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.
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Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.
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I've been barbecued, stewed, screwed, tattooed, and fried by people claiming to be my friends. The human race has gone backward, not forward, since the days we were apes swinging through the trees.
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I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to.
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There is not a man in America who has not had a secret ambition to boot an infant.
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Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.
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Try till you succeed...if you don't succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
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So long as the presence of death lurks with anyone who goes through the simple act of swallowing, I will make mine whiskey.
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Scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.
W. C. Fields
It's a wonderful thing, the D.T.'s. You can travel the world in a couple of hours. You see some mighty funny and curious things that come in assorted colors.
W. C. Fields
