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The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Humor
Comedy
Turn
Laziest
Turns
Pancakes
Ever
Popcorn
Would
Laziness
Men
Lazy
Mets
More quotes by W. C. Fields
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. Fields
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
W. C. Fields
There is not a man in America who has not had a secret ambition to boot an infant.
W. C. Fields
Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
W. C. Fields
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
W. C. Fields
What would you do if you were President, and, on the first day of May, the Russian Ambassador presented you with a beautiful cake which emitted a curious ticking noise? Would you plunge it into a pail of water - thus insulting Soviet cuisine in general?
W. C. Fields
The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother.
W. C. Fields
I'm looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.).
W. C. Fields
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
W. C. Fields
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
W. C. Fields
If I had my life to live over again, I'd live over a saloon.
W. C. Fields
The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when a wife was judged by the amount of wood she could split.
W. C. Fields
I never eat before breakfast.
W. C. Fields
First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.
W. C. Fields
I'd take a Bromo, but I can't stand the noise.
W. C. Fields
How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.
W. C. Fields
So long as the presence of death lurks with anyone who goes through the simple act of swallowing, I will make mine whiskey.
W. C. Fields
I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. Fields
Ain't fit for man nor beast
W. C. Fields
Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!
W. C. Fields
