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The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Mets
Humor
Comedy
Turn
Laziest
Turns
Pancakes
Ever
Popcorn
Would
Laziness
Men
Lazy
More quotes by W. C. Fields
It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.
W. C. Fields
It's what you do that counts and not what you say therefore I fired my press agent.
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Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
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Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.
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A man who overindulges lives in a dream. He becomes conceited. He thinks the whole world revolves around him and it usually does.
W. C. Fields
Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
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Business is an establishment that gives you the legal, even though unethical, right to screw the naive-right, left, and in the middle.
W. C. Fields
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
W. C. Fields
I like children. If they're properly cooked.
W. C. Fields
The funniest thing a comedian can do is not do it.
W. C. Fields
It's a funny old world. A man's lucky if he gets out of it alive.
W. C. Fields
If I ever found a church that didn't believe in knocking all the other churches, I might consider joining it.
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I never worry about being driven to drink I just worry about being driven home.
W. C. Fields
I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
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Marriage is better than leprosy only because it's easier to get rid of.
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Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
W. C. Fields
If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.
W. C. Fields
I didn't squawk about the steak, dear. I merely said I didn't see that old horse that used to be tethered outside here.
W. C. Fields
I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W. C. Fields
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
W. C. Fields
