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There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Must
Comedy
Men
Crazy
Bull
Time
Situation
Bulls
Face
Tail
Faces
Tails
Funny
Affairs
Comes
Affair
Take
Silly
More quotes by W. C. Fields
How is the human race going to survive now that the cost of living has gone up two dollars a quart?
W. C. Fields
It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.
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Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
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I have a poor memory for names but I seldom remember a face.
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Never mind what I told you - you do as I tell you.
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Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
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I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m.
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Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.
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I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.
W. C. Fields
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.
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Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
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I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.
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Scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.
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The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to sign me for the silent movies.
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I was married once--in San Francisco. I haven't seen her for many years. The great earthquake and fire in 1906 destroyed the marriage certificate. There's no legal proof. Which proves that earthquakes aren't all bad.
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Just like my Uncle Charlie used to say, just before he sprung the trap: He said, You can't cheat and honest man! Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump!
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Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
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I have been in the entertainment business some forty-three years, and I have never said anything detrimental or anything that might be construed as belittling any race or religion. I would be a sucker to do so because you can't insult the customers.
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Marriage is better than leprosy only because it's easier to get rid of.
W. C. Fields
The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother.
W. C. Fields
