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Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Life
Fish
Fishes
Downstream
Innovation
Upstream
Dead
Swimmer
Risk
Float
Takes
Floats
Remember
Swimming
Live
Swim

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.
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I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.
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Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
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Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch.
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Hollywood is the gold cap on a tooth that should have been pulled out years ago.
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I didn't say the meat was tough. I said I didn't see the horse that is usually outside.
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California is the only state in the union where you can fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.
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The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.
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Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy - but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas
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I once donated a pint of my finest red corpuscles to the great American Red Cross and the doctor opined my blood was very helpful contained so much alcohol they could use it to sterilize their instruments.
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I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.
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My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
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No man is boss in his own home, but he can make up for it, he thinks, by making a dog play dead.
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You can't cheat an honest man.
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The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
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Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.
W. C. Fields
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Try till you succeed...if you don't succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
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Buried my wife the other day. Had to, she died.
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I would rather be living in Philadelphia.
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What a gorgeous day. What effulgent sunshine. It was a day of this sort the McGillicuddy brothers murdered their mother with an axe.
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