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Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Somebody
Beer
Food
Alcohol
Days
Several
Water
Drinking
Corkscrew
Live
Wine
Safari
Book
Travel
Forgot
Nothing
Drink
Reminds
Journey
Africa
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. Fields
I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.
W. C. Fields
My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
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Ain't fit for man nor beast
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It's what you do that counts and not what you say therefore I fired my press agent.
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Yes I do like children ... Girl children...about eighteen or twenty.
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I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck
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Variant: I was driven to drink by a woman. I am forever grateful, yet I never had the good manners to thank her.
W. C. Fields
I don't know why I ever come in here. The flies get the best of everything.
W. C. Fields
It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.
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I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
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I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.
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I'm searching for loopholes.
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I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
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I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.
W. C. Fields
All things considered, I'd rather be in Philadelphia
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Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.
W. C. Fields
Thou shalt not kill anything less than a fifth.
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Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
W. C. Fields
I only drink to steady my nerves... sometimes I'm so steady I don't move for months.
W. C. Fields
