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Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Always
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Drunkenness
Carry
Snake
Case
Whiskey
Whisk
Smart
Snakes
Bourbon
Drink
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Furthermore
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Witty
Whisky
Small
Alcohol
Drinkers
Funny
Clever
Scotch
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
W. C. Fields
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
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Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.
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What a gorgeous day. What effulgent sunshine. It was a day of this sort the McGillicuddy brothers murdered their mother with an axe.
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I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. Fields
Sex isn't necessary. You don't die without it, but you can die having it.
W. C. Fields
I never eat before breakfast.
W. C. Fields
Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.
W. C. Fields
Buried my wife the other day. Had to, she died.
W. C. Fields
I've been drunk only once in my life. But that lasted for twenty-three years.
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If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
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Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
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I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. Fields
There are better things than sex, but nothing quite like it.
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When asked to borrow money: I'll see what my lawyer says. . . . And if he says yes, I'll get another lawyer.
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It's a funny old world. A man's lucky if he gets out of it alive.
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My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
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I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. Fields
I have a poor memory for names but I seldom remember a face.
W. C. Fields
Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
W. C. Fields
