Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. Fields
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Firsts
Humor
Rejection
First
Successful
Quit
Trying
Point
Quitting
Life
Success
Damn
Funny
Succeed
History
Fool
Business
Positive
Inspirational
Motivational
More quotes by W. C. Fields
I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.
W. C. Fields
I have been in the entertainment business some forty-three years, and I have never said anything detrimental or anything that might be construed as belittling any race or religion. I would be a sucker to do so because you can't insult the customers.
W. C. Fields
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
W. C. Fields
I ad lib most of my dialogue. If I did remember my lines, it would be too bad for me.
W. C. Fields
I'd take a Bromo, but I can't stand the noise.
W. C. Fields
Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
W. C. Fields
Thou shalt not kill anything less than a fifth.
W. C. Fields
Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.
W. C. Fields
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
W. C. Fields
I was almost put out of business by a well-meaning corpse.
W. C. Fields
I've never hit a woman in my life. Not even my own mother.
W. C. Fields
I've been on a 46-year diet of olives and alcohol. The latter I consume. The former I save and use over again in more alcohol. In my lifetime, I imagine, I have consumed at least $200,000 worth of whisky.
W. C. Fields
What would you do if you were President, and, on the first day of May, the Russian Ambassador presented you with a beautiful cake which emitted a curious ticking noise? Would you plunge it into a pail of water - thus insulting Soviet cuisine in general?
W. C. Fields
The funniest thing a comedian can do is not do it.
W. C. Fields
The best thing to break is a contract.
W. C. Fields
I like my films to influence the audience. Even if it means tripping their aged grandparents with a cane when they get home.
W. C. Fields
The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when a wife was judged by the amount of wood she could split.
W. C. Fields
Never eat at a place called 'Moms', but if the only other place in town has a sign that says 'Eats', go back to Moms.
W. C. Fields
The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.
W. C. Fields
A man who's intoxicated all the time doesn't need sympathy.
W. C. Fields
