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People prefer the certainty of misery to the misery of uncertainty

Virginia Satir

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Virginia Satir
Age: 72 †
Born: 1916
Born: June 26
Died: 1988
Died: September 10
Author
Psychotherapist
Social And Health Care Assistant
Social Worker
Teacher
Writer
Virginia M. Satir
Uncertainty
Certainty
Prefer
Misery
People

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Problems are not the problem coping is the problem.
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Rearing a family is probably the most difficult job in the world. It resembles two business firms merging their respective resources to make a single product. All the potential headaches of that operation are present when an adult male and an adult female join to steer a child from infancy to adulthood.
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There are five freedoms: The freedom to see and hear what is The freedom to say what you feel and think The freedom to feel what you actually feel The freedom to ask for what you want The freedom to take risks on your own behalf.
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Communication is to relationships what breath is to life.
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I am me and I am okay.
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Once a human being has arrived on this earth, communication is the largest single factor determining what kinds of relationships he makes with others and what happens to him in the world about him.
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We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.
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You have all played a significant part in my development of loving. As a result, my life has been rich and full, so I leave feeling very grateful.
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The message sent is not always the message received.
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Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible - the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.
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I want to love you without clutching, appreciate you without judging, join you without invading, invite you without demanding, leave you without guilt, criticize you without blaming, and help you without insulting. If I can have the same from you, then we can truly meet and enrich each other.
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The full life is filled with vulnerability, not defense. You face whatever feeling there is.
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The symbol in Chinese for crisis is made up of two ideographs: one means danger, the other means opportunity. This symbol is a reminder that we can choose to turn a crisis into an opportunity or into a negative experience.
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I think if I have one message, one thing before I die that most of the world would know, it would be that the event does not determine how to respond to the event. That is a purely personal matter. The way in which we respond will direct and influence the event more than the event itself.
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The recommended daily requirement for hugs is: four per day for survival, eight per day for maintenance, and twelve per day for growth.
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It is O. K. for me to feel angry and to express it in responsible ways.
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Parents teach in the toughest school in the world - The School for Making People. You are the board of education, the principal, the classroom teacher, and the janitor.
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Our biggest problem as human beings is not knowing that we don't know.
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I own me, and therefore, I can engineer me. I am me, and I am Okay.
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Life is not what it's supposed to be. It's what it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.
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