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People prefer the certainty of misery to the misery of uncertainty

Virginia Satir

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Virginia Satir
Age: 72 †
Born: 1916
Born: June 26
Died: 1988
Died: September 10
Author
Psychotherapist
Social And Health Care Assistant
Social Worker
Teacher
Writer
Virginia M. Satir
Prefer
Misery
People
Uncertainty
Certainty

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You have learned what you have learned very well. It has helped you survive.
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The symbol in Chinese for crisis is made up of two ideographs: one means danger, the other means opportunity. This symbol is a reminder that we can choose to turn a crisis into an opportunity or into a negative experience.
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I have talked about choosing rather than acting from compulsion. When you feel that you have to live according to someone else's direction or live so that you never disappoint or hurt anybody, then your life is a continual assessment of whether or not you please other people.
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Every word, facial expression, gesture, or action on the part of a parent gives the child some message about self-worth. It is sad that so many parents don't realize what messages they are sending.
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We get together on the basis of our similarities we grow on the basis of our differences.
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The message sent is not always the message received.
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I am me and I am okay.
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Many people are living in an emotional jail without realizing it.
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There are five freedoms: The freedom to see and hear what is The freedom to say what you feel and think The freedom to feel what you actually feel The freedom to ask for what you want The freedom to take risks on your own behalf.
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What lingers from the parent's individual past, unresolved or incomplete, often becomes part of her or his irrational parenting.
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I believe the greatest gift I can conceive of having from anyone is to be seen by them, heard by them, to be understood and touched by them.
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We can learn something new anytime we believe we can.
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I want to appreciate you without judging. Join you without invading. Invite you without demanding. Leave you without guilt.
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Problems are not the problem coping is the problem.
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Put together all the existing families and you have society. It is as simple as that. Whatever kind of training took place in the individual family will be reflected in the kind of society that these families create.
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Negotiating the adolescent stage is neither quick nor easy.
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Adolescents are not monsters. They are just people trying to learn how to make it among the adults in the world, who are probably not so sure themselves.
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I want to love you without clutching, appreciate you without judging, join you without invading, invite you without demanding, leave you without guilt, criticize you without blaming, and help you without insulting. If I can have the same from you, then we can truly meet and enrich each other.
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We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.
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Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible - the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.
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