Quote

You know daytime television? You know what it's supposed to be for? It's to keep unemployed people happy. It's supposed to stop them running to the social security demanding mad luxuries like cookers and windows.

Victoria Wood

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TAGS & TOPICS

Victoria Wood
Age: 62 †
Born: 1953
Born: May 19
Died: 2016
Died: April 20
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Pianist
Screenwriter
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Director
Security
Unemployed
Stop
Demanding
Happy
Windows
Social
Mad
Running
Luxury
Keep
Supposed
Cookers
Like
Window
Luxuries
People
Television
Daytime

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Acting is not my favourite thing. I don't like wearing costumes and wigs.
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My massage was marvellous. I feel really relaxed. And my masseur, Harold :You can't have a masseur called Harold. It's like having a member of the Royal Family called Ena.
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Jogging is for people who aren't intelligent enough to watch television.
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Everyone I meet is gay, married or crackers
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Well, I think there's not much of a chance for me finding somebody of my age. Gentlemen of my age are dropping down 30 years to find girlfriends.
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Of course I don't want to go to a cocktail party...If I wanted to stand around with a load of people I don't know eating bits of cold toast I can get caught shoplifting and go to Holloway [women's prison].
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In my day we didn't have sex education, we just picked up what we could off the television.
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In my 20s I was going round seeing agents who were patronising because I was fat and a girl, which was a double whammy. I knew what it was to feel out-of-the-loop.
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In London it's easy not to be the focus of attention, especially when Sting lives in the house just behind you.
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If God had meant men to have children, he would have given them a PVC apron.
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All my friends started getting boyfriends, but I didn't want a boyfriend, I wanted a thirteen-colour biro.
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I know I've got a degree. Why does that mean I have to spend my life with intellectuals? I've got a lifesaving certificate but I don't spend my evenings diving for a rubber brick with my pyjamas on.
Victoria Wood
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I sometimes think that being widowed is God's way of telling you to come off the Pill.
Victoria Wood
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If God had meant them to be lifted and separated, He would have put one on each shoulder.
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A lot of panel programmes rely on men topping each other, or sparring with each other, which is not generally a very female thing.
Victoria Wood
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In Russia, show the least athletic aptitude and they've got you dangling off the parallel bars with a leotard full of hormones.
Victoria Wood
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I used to make my own food and ate on my own in my room.
Victoria Wood
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I like writing a lot more than I used to. I used to find it scary but now I've got used to it once it gets going. I used to find it hard to start. Fear of the blank page. The first thing you write down won't bear any relation to what's in your head and that's always disappointing.
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Music enriches people's lives in the same way paintings and literature do. Everybody deserves that.
Victoria Wood
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Music is an element that should be part and parcel of every child's life via the education system.
Victoria Wood