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Well, I think there's not much of a chance for me finding somebody of my age. Gentlemen of my age are dropping down 30 years to find girlfriends.
Victoria Wood
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Victoria Wood
Age: 62 †
Born: 1953
Born: May 19
Died: 2016
Died: April 20
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Pianist
Screenwriter
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Director
Thinking
Age
Girlfriends
Chance
Gentlemen
Find
Dropping
Wells
Girlfriend
Well
Gentleman
Much
Findings
Years
Finding
Think
Somebody
More quotes by Victoria Wood
If God had meant them to be lifted and separated, He would have put one on each shoulder.
Victoria Wood
Everyone I meet is gay, married or crackers
Victoria Wood
If you behave normally, people treat you normally. It's only when you act as if you're someone special that they feel obliged to stand on ceremony.
Victoria Wood
I have been in a youth hostel...You are put in a kitchen with seventeen venture scouts with behavioural difficulties and made to wash swedes.
Victoria Wood
I wouldn't kidnap a man for sex - I'm not saying I couldn't use someone to oil the mower.
Victoria Wood
I sometimes think that being widowed is God's way of telling you to come off the Pill.
Victoria Wood
I once went to one of those parties where everyone throws their car keys into the middle of the room. I don't know who got my moped, but I drove that Peugeot for years.
Victoria Wood
I know I've got a degree. Why does that mean I have to spend my life with intellectuals? I've got a lifesaving certificate but I don't spend my evenings diving for a rubber brick with my pyjamas on.
Victoria Wood
Life's not fair, is it? Some of us drink champagne in the fast lane, and some of us eat our sandwiches by the loose chippings on the A597.
Victoria Wood
Last time I went Intercity there were a couple across the aisle having sex. Of course, this being a British train, nobody said anything. Then they finished, they both lit up a cigarette and this woman stood up and said, Excuse me, I think you'll find this is a non-smoking compartment.
Victoria Wood
All my friends started getting boyfriends, but I didn't want a boyfriend, I wanted a thirteen-colour biro.
Victoria Wood
I can remember when pants were pants. You wore them for twenty years, then you cut them down for pan scrubs. Or quilts.
Victoria Wood
On a train, why do I always end up sitting next to the woman who's eating the individual fruit pie by sucking the filling out through the hole in the middle?
Victoria Wood
I like writing a lot more than I used to. I used to find it scary but now I've got used to it once it gets going. I used to find it hard to start. Fear of the blank page. The first thing you write down won't bear any relation to what's in your head and that's always disappointing.
Victoria Wood
I've never understood the point of ecstasy. I think if I wanted to get dehydrated and jump about with a load of people I've never met before I could go to a Methodist barn dance.
Victoria Wood
People always think I hate doing interviews. I don't. I wouldn't do them if I didn't like them.
Victoria Wood
Radio killed variety and TV killed radio, and the internet will kill television and it will go on and on.
Victoria Wood
Music is an element that should be part and parcel of every child's life via the education system.
Victoria Wood
Of course I don't want to go to a cocktail party...If I wanted to stand around with a load of people I don't know eating bits of cold toast I can get caught shoplifting and go to Holloway [women's prison].
Victoria Wood
A lot of panel programmes rely on men topping each other, or sparring with each other, which is not generally a very female thing.
Victoria Wood