Quote

Occasionally, a finger comes up to wipe a tear [of laughter] from the eye... and that's my reward... the rest goes to the government.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Fingers
Laughter
Tears
Wipe
Rest
Tear
Goes
Occasionally
Eye
Finger
Comes
Reward
Government
Rewards

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What is the difference between a Nazi and a dog?The Nazi lifts his arm.
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My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
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I do not have a single white note on my piano my elephant smoked too much.
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The essence of a general's job is to assist in developing a clear sense of purpose . to keep the junk from getting in the way of important things.
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You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
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The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold.
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That's why I've never thought of retiring because I do it all the time whether on the stage or off. I found that in a precarious situation, a smile is the shortest distance between people. When one needs to reach out for sympathy or a link with people, what better way is there?
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...the elephant smoked too much.
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A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.
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They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
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(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
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I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.
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Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.
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In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
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If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.
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I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible? and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary.
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Many people have asked me why there are three pedals in these grand pianos. Well the pedal in the middle is there to separate the two other pedals.
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It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.
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There is a bit of Hans Christian Andersen in every Dane.
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He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
Victor Borge