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In my dreams of Heaven, I always see the great Masters gathered in a huge hall in which they all reside. Only Mozart has his own suite.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Halls
Masters
Dreams
Huge
Suite
Heaven
Reside
Dream
Mozart
Great
Gathered
Always
Hall

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I don't mind growing old. I'm just not used to it.
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Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.
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It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.
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In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
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...the elephant smoked too much.
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The conductor is a peculiar person. He turns his back on his friends in the audience, shakes a stick at his players in the orchestra, and then wonders why nobody loves him.
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How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.
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A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.
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I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more. But how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?
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He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
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I learned to play the piano on my mother's knee - that was before we got a piano.
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There are three Bachs. Johann, Sebastian and Offen.
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Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
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(Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?
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What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
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I only know two pieces one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.
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Many people have asked me why there are three pedals in these grand pianos. Well the pedal in the middle is there to separate the two other pedals.
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Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.
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My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
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Did you know that Mozart had no arms and no legs? I've seen statues of him on people's pianos.
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