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In my dreams of Heaven, I always see the great Masters gathered in a huge hall in which they all reside. Only Mozart has his own suite.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Huge
Suite
Heaven
Reside
Dream
Mozart
Great
Gathered
Always
Hall
Halls
Masters
Dreams

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My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
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When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance.
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The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold.
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Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats.
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They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
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Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
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Occasionally, a finger comes up to wipe a tear [of laughter] from the eye... and that's my reward... the rest goes to the government.
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Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics.
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It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.
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The essence of a general's job is to assist in developing a clear sense of purpose . to keep the junk from getting in the way of important things.
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What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
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I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible? and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary.
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I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more. But how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?
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(Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?
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I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I've saved all year.
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Many people have asked me why there are three pedals in these grand pianos. Well the pedal in the middle is there to separate the two other pedals.
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...the elephant smoked too much.
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You may not be aware of this but Leonard Bernstein won another award, for explaining the music of Igor Stravinsky... to Igor Stravinsky!
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Mendelssohn never wrote any Water Music. However, he wrote the Scotch Symphony, which is even better, or at least stronger.
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In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
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