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The first piano was built long after they didn't have any at all.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Built
Didn
Firsts
First
Long
Piano

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I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.
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Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.
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Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.
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And now, in honour of the 150th anniversary of Beethoven's death, I would like to play 'Clear the Saloon', er, 'Clair de Lune', by Debussy. I don't play Beethoven so well, but I play Debussy very badly, and Beethoven would have liked that.
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What is the difference between a Nazi and a dog?The Nazi lifts his arm.
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(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
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The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow)
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Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics.
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Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.
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When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance.
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You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
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One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.
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If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.
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A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.
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When I was a little boy and played Liebestraum, my father used to hit me on the head with a newspaper every time I slopped the cadenza . . . I hate Liebestraum.
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They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
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Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.
Victor Borge
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What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
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In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
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I don't mind growing old. I'm just not used to it.
Victor Borge