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How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.
Victor Borge
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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Aggression
Germany
Sleep
Knowing
Nice
Invaded
Peace
Denmark
Pact
Germans
More quotes by Victor Borge
In my dreams of Heaven, I always see the great Masters gathered in a huge hall in which they all reside. Only Mozart has his own suite.
Victor Borge
Occasionally, a finger comes up to wipe a tear [of laughter] from the eye... and that's my reward... the rest goes to the government.
Victor Borge
I learned to play the piano on my mother's knee - that was before we got a piano.
Victor Borge
They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
Victor Borge
You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
Victor Borge
In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
Victor Borge
You may not be aware of this but Leonard Bernstein won another award, for explaining the music of Igor Stravinsky... to Igor Stravinsky!
Victor Borge
I do not have a single white note on my piano my elephant smoked too much.
Victor Borge
If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.
Victor Borge
Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics.
Victor Borge
Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.
Victor Borge
And now, in honour of the 150th anniversary of Beethoven's death, I would like to play 'Clear the Saloon', er, 'Clair de Lune', by Debussy. I don't play Beethoven so well, but I play Debussy very badly, and Beethoven would have liked that.
Victor Borge
A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.
Victor Borge
The first piano was built long after they didn't have any at all.
Victor Borge
One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.
Victor Borge
(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
Victor Borge
There is a bit of Hans Christian Andersen in every Dane.
Victor Borge
I don't mind growing old. I'm just not used to it.
Victor Borge
That's why I've never thought of retiring because I do it all the time whether on the stage or off. I found that in a precarious situation, a smile is the shortest distance between people. When one needs to reach out for sympathy or a link with people, what better way is there?
Victor Borge
When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance.
Victor Borge