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Did you know that Mozart had no arms and no legs? I've seen statues of him on people's pianos.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Pianos
Mozart
Statues
Piano
Legs
Arms
Seen
People

More quotes by Victor Borge

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Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.
Victor Borge
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In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
Victor Borge
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It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.
Victor Borge
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How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.
Victor Borge
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...the elephant smoked too much.
Victor Borge
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I do not have a single white note on my piano my elephant smoked too much.
Victor Borge
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You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
Victor Borge
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The essence of a general's job is to assist in developing a clear sense of purpose . to keep the junk from getting in the way of important things.
Victor Borge
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I learned to play the piano on my mother's knee - that was before we got a piano.
Victor Borge
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(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
Victor Borge
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I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.
Victor Borge
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Occasionally, a finger comes up to wipe a tear [of laughter] from the eye... and that's my reward... the rest goes to the government.
Victor Borge
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If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.
Victor Borge
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I only know two pieces one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.
Victor Borge
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Mendelssohn never wrote any Water Music. However, he wrote the Scotch Symphony, which is even better, or at least stronger.
Victor Borge
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They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
Victor Borge
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Beethoven wrote in three flats a lot. That's because he moved twice.
Victor Borge
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There are three Bachs. Johann, Sebastian and Offen.
Victor Borge
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(Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?
Victor Borge
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Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.
Victor Borge