Quote

...the elephant smoked too much.

Victor Borge

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Music
Much
Smoked
Elephant
Elephants

More quotes by Victor Borge

Image
Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
Victor Borge
Image
Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.
Victor Borge
Image
Occasionally, a finger comes up to wipe a tear [of laughter] from the eye... and that's my reward... the rest goes to the government.
Victor Borge
Image
What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
Victor Borge
Image
There is a bit of Hans Christian Andersen in every Dane.
Victor Borge
Image
(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
Victor Borge
Image
The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.
Victor Borge
Image
They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
Victor Borge
Image
Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats.
Victor Borge
Image
Beethoven wrote in three flats a lot. That's because he moved twice.
Victor Borge
Image
(Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?
Victor Borge
Image
I only know two pieces one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.
Victor Borge
Image
My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
Victor Borge
Image
It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.
Victor Borge
Image
You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
Victor Borge
Image
One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.
Victor Borge
Image
What is the difference between a Nazi and a dog?The Nazi lifts his arm.
Victor Borge
Image
He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
Victor Borge
Image
Did you know that Mozart had no arms and no legs? I've seen statues of him on people's pianos.
Victor Borge
Image
How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.
Victor Borge