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Read (this book), smile, enjoy, and if you happen to learn something along the way, don't get upset.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Learn
Upset
Happens
Smile
Book
Along
Something
Happen
Way
Reading
Read
Funny
Enjoy

More quotes by Victor Borge

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Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.
Victor Borge
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The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold.
Victor Borge
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I learned to play the piano on my mother's knee - that was before we got a piano.
Victor Borge
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In my dreams of Heaven, I always see the great Masters gathered in a huge hall in which they all reside. Only Mozart has his own suite.
Victor Borge
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Occasionally, a finger comes up to wipe a tear [of laughter] from the eye... and that's my reward... the rest goes to the government.
Victor Borge
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I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible? and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary.
Victor Borge
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I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I've saved all year.
Victor Borge
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What is the difference between a Nazi and a dog?The Nazi lifts his arm.
Victor Borge
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One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.
Victor Borge
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A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.
Victor Borge
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The essence of a general's job is to assist in developing a clear sense of purpose . to keep the junk from getting in the way of important things.
Victor Borge
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You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
Victor Borge
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My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
Victor Borge
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Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.
Victor Borge
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You may not be aware of this but Leonard Bernstein won another award, for explaining the music of Igor Stravinsky... to Igor Stravinsky!
Victor Borge
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And now, in honour of the 150th anniversary of Beethoven's death, I would like to play 'Clear the Saloon', er, 'Clair de Lune', by Debussy. I don't play Beethoven so well, but I play Debussy very badly, and Beethoven would have liked that.
Victor Borge
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If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.
Victor Borge
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I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more. But how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?
Victor Borge
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The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.
Victor Borge
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(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
Victor Borge