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Mendelssohn never wrote any Water Music. However, he wrote the Scotch Symphony, which is even better, or at least stronger.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Funny
Scotch
Music
Symphony
Better
Humorous
Even
Wrote
Never
Stronger
However
Least
Water
Mendelssohn

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Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.
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(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
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The first piano was built long after they didn't have any at all.
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That's why I've never thought of retiring because I do it all the time whether on the stage or off. I found that in a precarious situation, a smile is the shortest distance between people. When one needs to reach out for sympathy or a link with people, what better way is there?
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I only know two pieces one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.
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You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
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The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.
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How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.
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A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.
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I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more. But how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?
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You may not be aware of this but Leonard Bernstein won another award, for explaining the music of Igor Stravinsky... to Igor Stravinsky!
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Occasionally, a finger comes up to wipe a tear [of laughter] from the eye... and that's my reward... the rest goes to the government.
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The conductor is a peculiar person. He turns his back on his friends in the audience, shakes a stick at his players in the orchestra, and then wonders why nobody loves him.
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The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow)
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And now, in honour of the 150th anniversary of Beethoven's death, I would like to play 'Clear the Saloon', er, 'Clair de Lune', by Debussy. I don't play Beethoven so well, but I play Debussy very badly, and Beethoven would have liked that.
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I learned to play the piano on my mother's knee - that was before we got a piano.
Victor Borge
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Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.
Victor Borge
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Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics.
Victor Borge
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The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold.
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In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
Victor Borge