Quote

Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Music
Humorous
Need
Lawyer
Needs
Function
Like
Constant
Mouthpiece
Air
Clarinet
Cases
Lawyers
Funny
Supply
Order
Hot

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When I was a little boy and played Liebestraum, my father used to hit me on the head with a newspaper every time I slopped the cadenza . . . I hate Liebestraum.
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Beethoven wrote in three flats a lot. That's because he moved twice.
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I learned to play the piano on my mother's knee - that was before we got a piano.
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You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
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...the elephant smoked too much.
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One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.
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It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.
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My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
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The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold.
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What is the difference between a Nazi and a dog?The Nazi lifts his arm.
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I do not have a single white note on my piano my elephant smoked too much.
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The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.
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Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.
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That's why I've never thought of retiring because I do it all the time whether on the stage or off. I found that in a precarious situation, a smile is the shortest distance between people. When one needs to reach out for sympathy or a link with people, what better way is there?
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I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I've saved all year.
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Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics.
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I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.
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They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
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What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
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In my dreams of Heaven, I always see the great Masters gathered in a huge hall in which they all reside. Only Mozart has his own suite.
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