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When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Star
Usually
Head
Improves
Stars
Sings
Religion
Sarcastic
Funny
Opera
Music
Appearance

More quotes by Victor Borge

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Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.
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The first piano was built long after they didn't have any at all.
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You may not be aware of this but Leonard Bernstein won another award, for explaining the music of Igor Stravinsky... to Igor Stravinsky!
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Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
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(Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?
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I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more. But how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?
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Read (this book), smile, enjoy, and if you happen to learn something along the way, don't get upset.
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...the elephant smoked too much.
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The essence of a general's job is to assist in developing a clear sense of purpose . to keep the junk from getting in the way of important things.
Victor Borge
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It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it.
Victor Borge
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There are three Bachs. Johann, Sebastian and Offen.
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Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics.
Victor Borge
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I only know two pieces one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.
Victor Borge
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Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats.
Victor Borge
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They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
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How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.
Victor Borge
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He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
Victor Borge
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There is a bit of Hans Christian Andersen in every Dane.
Victor Borge
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The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow)
Victor Borge
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In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
Victor Borge