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The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Sarcasm
Sarcastic
Difference
Longer
Differences
Funny
Viola
Burns
Violin

More quotes by Victor Borge

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When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance.
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What is the difference between a Nazi and a dog?The Nazi lifts his arm.
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One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.
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I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.
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Mendelssohn never wrote any Water Music. However, he wrote the Scotch Symphony, which is even better, or at least stronger.
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Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.
Victor Borge
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Did you know that Mozart had no arms and no legs? I've seen statues of him on people's pianos.
Victor Borge
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I do not have a single white note on my piano my elephant smoked too much.
Victor Borge
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(Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?
Victor Borge
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(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
Victor Borge
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I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more. But how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?
Victor Borge
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That's why I've never thought of retiring because I do it all the time whether on the stage or off. I found that in a precarious situation, a smile is the shortest distance between people. When one needs to reach out for sympathy or a link with people, what better way is there?
Victor Borge
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The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow)
Victor Borge
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You want something by Bach? Which one, Johann Sebastian or Jacques Offen?
Victor Borge
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The conductor is a peculiar person. He turns his back on his friends in the audience, shakes a stick at his players in the orchestra, and then wonders why nobody loves him.
Victor Borge
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Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
Victor Borge
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The essence of a general's job is to assist in developing a clear sense of purpose . to keep the junk from getting in the way of important things.
Victor Borge
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Always remember to forget the things that made you sad, but never forget to remember the things that made you glad.
Victor Borge
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My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
Victor Borge
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I don't mind growing old. I'm just not used to it.
Victor Borge