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Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.
Victor Borge
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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Ideas
Comedian
Pianist
Right
Aging
Conductor
Years
Humorous
Visitors
People
Christmas
Visiting
Humor
Santa
Year
Guests
Funny
Visit
Xmas
Idea
Witty
Claus
More quotes by Victor Borge
I do not have a single white note on my piano my elephant smoked too much.
Victor Borge
In my youth, I wanted to be a great pantomimist -- but I found I had nothing to say.
Victor Borge
How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.
Victor Borge
What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
Victor Borge
Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics.
Victor Borge
I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.
Victor Borge
...the elephant smoked too much.
Victor Borge
A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.
Victor Borge
Many people have asked me why there are three pedals in these grand pianos. Well the pedal in the middle is there to separate the two other pedals.
Victor Borge
I only know two pieces one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.
Victor Borge
Mendelssohn never wrote any Water Music. However, he wrote the Scotch Symphony, which is even better, or at least stronger.
Victor Borge
He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
Victor Borge
(Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them?
Victor Borge
They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
Victor Borge
Did you know that Mozart had no arms and no legs? I've seen statues of him on people's pianos.
Victor Borge
I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I've saved all year.
Victor Borge
Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
Victor Borge
I don't mind growing old. I'm just not used to it.
Victor Borge
The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow)
Victor Borge
(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
Victor Borge