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Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Right
Aging
Conductor
Years
Humorous
Visitors
People
Christmas
Visiting
Humor
Santa
Year
Guests
Funny
Visit
Xmas
Idea
Witty
Claus
Ideas
Comedian
Pianist

More quotes by Victor Borge

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The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow)
Victor Borge
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How nice. Now the Germans can sleep in peace, knowing that they will not be invaded by us.
Victor Borge
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There are three Bachs. Johann, Sebastian and Offen.
Victor Borge
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Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats.
Victor Borge
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Many people have asked me why there are three pedals in these grand pianos. Well the pedal in the middle is there to separate the two other pedals.
Victor Borge
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Occasionally, a finger comes up to wipe a tear [of laughter] from the eye... and that's my reward... the rest goes to the government.
Victor Borge
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My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
Victor Borge
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I do not have a single white note on my piano my elephant smoked too much.
Victor Borge
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A Smile is a curve which can set a lot of things straight.
Victor Borge
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Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.
Victor Borge
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He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
Victor Borge
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(Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded?
Victor Borge
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Clarinets, like lawyers, have cases, mouthpieces, and they need a constant supply of hot air in order to function.
Victor Borge
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There is a bit of Hans Christian Andersen in every Dane.
Victor Borge
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One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.
Victor Borge
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The first piano was built long after they didn't have any at all.
Victor Borge
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I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more. But how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?
Victor Borge
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I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible? and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary.
Victor Borge
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You may not be aware of this but Leonard Bernstein won another award, for explaining the music of Igor Stravinsky... to Igor Stravinsky!
Victor Borge
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What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
Victor Borge