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Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.

Victor Borge

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Victor Borge
Age: 91 †
Born: 1909
Born: January 3
Died: 2000
Died: December 23
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Conductor
Pianist
Stand-Up Comedian
København
Børge Rosenbaum
Funny
Visit
Xmas
Idea
Witty
Claus
Ideas
Comedian
Pianist
Right
Aging
Conductor
Years
Humorous
Visitors
People
Christmas
Visiting
Humor
Santa
Year
Guests

More quotes by Victor Borge

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Beethoven wrote in three flats a lot. That's because he moved twice.
Victor Borge
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And now, in honour of the 150th anniversary of Beethoven's death, I would like to play 'Clear the Saloon', er, 'Clair de Lune', by Debussy. I don't play Beethoven so well, but I play Debussy very badly, and Beethoven would have liked that.
Victor Borge
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One afternoon, when I was four years old, my father came home, and he found me in the living room in front of a roaring fire, which made him very angry. Because we didn't have a fireplace.
Victor Borge
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I only know two pieces one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't.
Victor Borge
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Mendelssohn never wrote any Water Music. However, he wrote the Scotch Symphony, which is even better, or at least stronger.
Victor Borge
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Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
Victor Borge
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That's why I've never thought of retiring because I do it all the time whether on the stage or off. I found that in a precarious situation, a smile is the shortest distance between people. When one needs to reach out for sympathy or a link with people, what better way is there?
Victor Borge
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Read (this book), smile, enjoy, and if you happen to learn something along the way, don't get upset.
Victor Borge
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The essence of a general's job is to assist in developing a clear sense of purpose . to keep the junk from getting in the way of important things.
Victor Borge
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Many people have asked me why there are three pedals in these grand pianos. Well the pedal in the middle is there to separate the two other pedals.
Victor Borge
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The first piano was built long after they didn't have any at all.
Victor Borge
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I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible? and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary.
Victor Borge
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In my dreams of Heaven, I always see the great Masters gathered in a huge hall in which they all reside. Only Mozart has his own suite.
Victor Borge
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What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
Victor Borge
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If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward.
Victor Borge
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When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance.
Victor Borge
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The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow)
Victor Borge
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My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it.
Victor Borge
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They say that Nero started the fire himself because he needed a suitable backdrop for his concert.
Victor Borge
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The conductor is a peculiar person. He turns his back on his friends in the audience, shakes a stick at his players in the orchestra, and then wonders why nobody loves him.
Victor Borge