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How have I never realized before that for all the strong, kind parts of him, there are also hurting, broken parts?
Veronica Roth
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Veronica Roth
Age: 36
Born: 1988
Born: August 19
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
New York City
New York
Veronica Anne Roth
Realized
Parts
Broken
Hurt
Strong
Also
Kind
Tobias
Never
Hurting
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Thank you for your honesty, Niles says. The Candor repeat the phrase under their breath. All around me are the words Thank you for your honesty at different volumes and pitches, and my anger begins to dissolve.
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We share a common enemy, but does that make us friends?
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We can't be confined to one way of thinking, and that terrifies our leaders. It means we can't be controlled. And it means that no matter what they do, we will always cause trouble for them.
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To find that place between what I want and what I think is wise.
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I love you I say. I love you, too he says. I'll see you soon.
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People, I have discovered, are layers and layers of secrets. You believe you know them, that you understand them, but their motives are always hidden from you, buried in their own hearts. You will never know them, but sometimes you decide to trust them.
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The division is based on knowledge, based on qualifications - but as I learned from the factionless, a system that relies on a group of uneducated people to do its dirty work without giving them a way to rise is hardly fair.
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Out of my peripheral vision, I see Four shove the door open and walk out. Apparently this fight isn't interesting enough for him. Or maybe he's going to figure out why everything's spinning like a top, and I don't blame him I want to know the answer too.
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But when I do feel all the strength go out of me, and I fall to my knees beside the table and I think I cry, then, or at least I want to, and everything inside me screams for just one more kiss, one more word, one more glance, one more.
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How strange that something so simple could have been instrumental in my decision to ruin one of my most relationships and friendships, and damage another.
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I fell in love with him. But I don't just stay with him by default as if there's no one else available to me. I stay with him because I choose to, every day that I wake up, every day that we fight or lie to each other or disappoint each other. I choose him over and over again, and he chooses me.
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And then the screaming begins.
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I know I belong in Dauntless because everything I did in that aptitude test told me so. I'm loyal to my faction for that reason -- because there's nowhere else I could possibly be. But her? And you? She shakes her head. I have no idea who you're loyal to. And I'm not going to pretend like everything's okay.
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I shift from one foot to the other, trying to get a good look at him. When I finally do, I look away. His eyes were already on me, probably drawn by my nervous movement.
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What makes you different, makes you dangerous.
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I wonder if fears ever really go away, or if they just lose their power over us.
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But now I know how large the world is... Well. I suppose I have grown to large out of my faction. As a consequence.
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He is not sweet or gentle or particularly kind. But he is smart and brave, and even though he saved me, he treated me like I was strong. That is all I need to know.
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Sometimes all I want is to be a few inches taller so the world does not look like a dense collection of torsos.
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