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I'm really bad at being nonviolent.

Vanessa Veselka

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Vanessa Veselka
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: March 14
Writer
Eagle Pass
Texas
Really
Nonviolent

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For me it comes down to one thing: I'm trying to follow my own nature.
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If you're with an agent and they don't like where your work is going - the pressure behind it is the pressure of the hierarchy which says I know what I am talking about, which I find offensive.
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There's a big part of me that's atheist. There's a big part of me that's agnostic. And there's a big part of me that tends towards the mystic. The thing that I find is most important in all of that is to retain my sense of wonder and the idea that I don't actually know what's going to happen.
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I light candles. I meditate. And I don't believe in anything. By default I move simultaneously towards mysticism and atheism. It's not something that's ever going to get fixed.
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Some things are so sad that they have no name. I have tried to name them and I can't.
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As a songwriter and musician, it strikes me that in music, a certain territorial nature when it comes to one's own autonomy around life and art is common and understood.
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I would love to love something, especially if I could do it without feeling like I was watching it die right in front of me.
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But I know what it means to crave what you're not. To want to sew up that rift because it's exhausting to hold it open. Sometimes you just need to be someone else, someone who doesn't care about anything at all. I know I do. I want emptiness but I can't have it.
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Go ahead and do what you're doing.
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Being well-mannered and gracious and kind are things that I value really highly.
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I was always face to face with total futility and powerlessness.
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The world is a violent child none of us will get to see grow up.
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There doesn't seem to be a lot of stance from the outside of that world to disagree.
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The equation Bubble Tea = Something to Look Forward To depressurizes the misery of capitalism and is a Hello Kitty band-aid on the festering wound of Neo-Liberalism.
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I learned to live in my own head. I learned to follow intuition and more than anything, I learned what was important to me.
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