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We can't get kicked out of McDonald's! This is like the DMZ of drunk eating.

Tucker Max

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Tucker Max
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: September 27
Author
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Atlanta
Georgia
Mcdonald
Kicked
Drunk
Eating
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You can't fill your emails with crap, at least not with my friends, because they're brutal. If something sucks, they'll tell you.
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My path to wisdom began when I stopped pretending to know things I didn't know. When I explicitly admitted to the limits of my knowledge, stopped building on ambiguity and ignorance, and instead realized that I knew nothing, not even the things I thought I knew.
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Communication is not what we say, but what you hear (which is a lesson I wish our educational system understood)
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The hardest lesson I've had to learn in my life is that my intelligence is inversely correlated to my humility. The more I thought I knew, the less I actually knew.
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Opinions are projections.
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You know that look a cop gives you when he's so confused that he doesn't even know how to respond? If you don't know that look, it means you haven't had enough fun in your life.
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You ever wake up in the middle of the night because a couple of cats are clawing each other to death outside your window? That's what it's like listening to you speak.
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What people who don't create don't understand, is that once you take money from the machine, the machine [movie industry] owns you.
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I sold a million books because I have a lot of fans, not because people hate me.
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Leave it up to hipster nerds to pretend to hate something that they actually want
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Helping reproductive services doesn't just help women in isolation. It helps men just as much.
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I stop paying attention because as much as I love beauty, I hate stupidity, and seeing the two combined pisses me off.
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Most people's lives are nothing more than pointlessly frantic activity used as a psychological defense against their own impotence and fear.
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I'm not even the coolest one of my friends. I'm just the guy who sat down and wrote everything down. Like I know plenty of people who do crazier stuff than I do.
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Getting offended is a great way to avoid answering questions that make you sound dumb.
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No sheep wants to be first through the gate, but every sheep will be second.
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Listen to authority figures because of their position, but only believe them if they can explain why.
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Even if I was a Republican, George Bush would have pushed me out of that party.
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A lot of people think that since I'm drunk in my stories, I must be drunk 24 hours a day. What kind of stupid logic is that? It'd be like if you saw Michael Jordan at a restaurant and were like, Why aren't you in your basketball uniform? I leave out way more than I put in.
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Men will treat you the way you let them. There is no such thing as 'deserving' respect you get what you demand from people.
Tucker Max