Quote

Tucker: You guys going to Milwaukee? Guy: Yes sir, heading home after a vacation. Tucker: Did you know there are midgets in Milwaukee? [The man and his wife are silent and confused.] Tucker: HUNDREDS OF THEM!

Tucker Max

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TAGS & TOPICS

Tucker Max
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: September 27
Author
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Atlanta
Georgia
Wife
Midget
Guy
Heading
Home
Headings
Going
Vacation
Men
Hundreds
Confused
Midgets
Silent
Tucker
Guys
Milwaukee

More quotes by Tucker Max

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The thing that I think about the most, and is the most rewarding to me, is the whole past. That I kind of went from nothing to something and I did it on my own, and I did it through hard work and smarts.
Tucker Max
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You play crotch roulette, you're gonna hit double zero once in a while.
Tucker Max
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I've come to learn that what really matters is the relationship, the quality of the relationship.
Tucker Max
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The devil doesn't come dressed in a red cape and pointy horns. He comes as everything you've ever wished for.
Tucker Max
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No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.
Tucker Max
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You can't do anything yourself on TV... unless you have a LOT of money, but you can do an independent movie.
Tucker Max
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I am Shiva, Destroyer of Worlds.
Tucker Max
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I'm sorry, but I stand by my decision. I am now a member of the elite club of people that have fought a professional team mascot. You sir, are not in that club.
Tucker Max
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Hi. I haven't insulted you yet, have I?
Tucker Max
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To get hwat you want out of life, all you really need to do is be honest about it, don't be afraid to go for it, and have fun while you do it -- and you'll eventually get it.
Tucker Max
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9:00: I don't know what I want. I just point at the Dollar Menu and say, 'Give me all of that.
Tucker Max
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I never understand why women think drama and bullshit are attractive to guys. They’re not. I’m going to be real clear about this, ladies, so pay attention: Prince Charming doesn't come to rescue cunty lunatics.
Tucker Max
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I was stupid when I was 17 or 18. My thought process was that I thought that I was legitimately a hyper-genius, and so I wanted to go to the hardest academic school I could to see if I was really as smart as I thought I was.
Tucker Max
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Guys, we spend our whole lives trying to get pussy, so when pussy comes to us, it's like, Whoa, this is amazing! At 27, I thought nothing could be better than that, but at 35, I've come to understand the darker side of it.
Tucker Max
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It [eBook] is like introducing the machine gun to a revolutionary war. It changes everything. If you can reach your fans directly without having to go through a middle man, the entire economics of the publishing business changes.
Tucker Max
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Failure either ruins you, or turns you into the man you can become.
Tucker Max
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I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don't believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist. (Quoting feedback from a reader)
Tucker Max
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Look at the scope of writers who sell stuff. I'm at the very top of the power curve in terms of sales.
Tucker Max
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Before I was famous, I already was the person that attracted and dealt with a lot of weirdos.
Tucker Max
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In training, there is no winning or losing. There is only learning.
Tucker Max