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That's the beauty of alcohol. If you don't remember it, it didn't happen.

Tucker Max

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Tucker Max
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: September 27
Author
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Atlanta
Georgia
Remember
Alcohol
Happen
Beauty
Didn
Happens

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No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.
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Hey man, can you talk to dolphins and pilot whales with that huge forehead of yours?
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Frankly, I'd rather make a little bit less money if it means living in a better world for books and publishing in the future.
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General reader feedback is usually pretty worthless. 99% of people give feedback that is irrelevant, stupid, or just flat out wrong. But that 1% of people who give good feedback are invaluable.
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Great careers are getting easier to find and audition for, but harder to keep.
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I will never understand why people get so upset at things I don't even remember saying.
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The Big Five publishing companies are dinosaurs trying to survive in a post-meteor world. They won't.
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It [eBook] is like introducing the machine gun to a revolutionary war. It changes everything. If you can reach your fans directly without having to go through a middle man, the entire economics of the publishing business changes.
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You can't fill your emails with crap, at least not with my friends, because they're brutal. If something sucks, they'll tell you.
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No sheep wants to be first through the gate, but every sheep will be second.
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Probably the best explanation for my success and other Internet writers, is that we're tapping a genre or a niche out there that needs to be filled and isn't.
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I think that there's a lot of guys out there that want to read the equivalent of chick lit, but really there's not being much written for them.
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Gotta love alcohol and sex hormones.
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Hi. I haven't insulted you yet, have I?
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You know that look a cop gives you when he's so confused that he doesn't even know how to respond? If you don't know that look, it means you haven't had enough fun in your life.
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You show me a truly funny girl who doesn't have emotional issues, and I'll introduce you to my stable of unicorn thoroughbreds ridden by leprechaun jockeys.
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I've come to learn that what really matters is the relationship, the quality of the relationship.
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If you make comedy, if you try and make comedy where no one gets upset or offended, you're going to fail.
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The general intellectual level of South Florida is somewhere just above functionally retarded.
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If you don't have a job right now, and you have a computer and a basic intelligence level, I guarantee you can get a great job, paying really well, in less than three months. How? Learn to program.
Tucker Max