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This may come as a shock to some of you, but I have a slightly volatile personality. I don’t suffer fools well.
Tucker Max
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Tucker Max
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: September 27
Author
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Atlanta
Georgia
Suffering
May
Volatile
Wells
Slightly
Come
Fools
Well
Shock
Suffer
Personality
Fool
More quotes by Tucker Max
Fat girls aren’t real people.
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I don't want to compare myself to Picasso, but he had four or five periods in his life. Any good artist grows and changes and matures.
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Two girls called me closed minded. I tell them that they are so open-minded their brains leaked out.
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Motherfucker. She leaves me no choice. Now I have to break her self-esteem, sleep with her and steal the shirt.
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If people try to judge you or shame you for doing safe, consensual things that make you happy, I can guarantee you they're bad people.
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Obstacles are only obstacles if you see them as obstacles. They can also be called opportunities.
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You look like the type of people who would criticize a misspelling in a suicide note.
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I'm never going to be Tolstoy.
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I stop paying attention because as much as I love beauty, I hate stupidity, and seeing the two combined pisses me off.
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I've come to learn that what really matters is the relationship, the quality of the relationship.
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Tucker: You guys going to Milwaukee? Guy: Yes sir, heading home after a vacation. Tucker: Did you know there are midgets in Milwaukee? [The man and his wife are silent and confused.] Tucker: HUNDREDS OF THEM!
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I think 20th century media were about tricking people - and the beauty of the Internet is you can't lie anymore.
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If you don't have a job right now, and you have a computer and a basic intelligence level, I guarantee you can get a great job, paying really well, in less than three months. How? Learn to program.
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Hey man, can you talk to dolphins and pilot whales with that huge forehead of yours?
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You know that look a cop gives you when he's so confused that he doesn't even know how to respond? If you don't know that look, it means you haven't had enough fun in your life.
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Listen to authority figures because of their position, but only believe them if they can explain why.
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Tell beautiful women they are smart, and smart women they are beautiful.
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My writing is authentic, and whatever happens in my life is what I write about.
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If you make comedy, if you try and make comedy where no one gets upset or offended, you're going to fail.
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I try to explain to people that the only way to be cool is to be who you truly are, and the only way to live life is to do the things that you want to do and be the person that you want to be no matter who that is or what that is or how you have to do it. That's the only way you can be genuinely happy.
Tucker Max
