Quote

Motherfucker. She leaves me no choice. Now I have to break her self-esteem, sleep with her and steal the shirt.

Tucker Max

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Tucker Max
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: September 27
Author
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Atlanta
Georgia
Choice
Sleep
Motherfucker
Break
Shirt
Choices
Steal
Self
Shirts
Stealing
Esteem
Leaves

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I am Shiva, Destroyer of Worlds.
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I masterbate in the shower. My action figures judge me. Especially the Justice League.
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I think 20th century media were about tricking people - and the beauty of the Internet is you can't lie anymore.
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Obstacles are only obstacles if you see them as obstacles. They can also be called opportunities.
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Yinzer: DAMN!! I wish I had your balls! Tucker:I wish you had a breath mint, but I guess we don't always get what we wish for.
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The vast majority of all consequences, especially in 21st century America, are completely meaningless bullshit.
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As a general rule, whenever guys have problems approaching girls, it's because they're afraid of rejection or they're afraid of something specific. The way that you get over a fear like that is you figure out what the worst is that can happen.
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I was not developmentally disabled, but didn't mature at the same rate other kids did.
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I've come to learn that what really matters is the relationship, the quality of the relationship.
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I hated being a lawyer and I wanted to like myself and like my job.
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Unless you plan on making academia your life, all you need to know about postmodernism is that its premises are fundamentally wrong.
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What people who don't create don't understand, is that once you take money from the machine, the machine [movie industry] owns you.
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Probably the best explanation for my success and other Internet writers, is that we're tapping a genre or a niche out there that needs to be filled and isn't.
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The meaning of life is to create meaning for your life.
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The only thing that someone could say about me that would hurt me would be something that's true that I don't want to be.
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Most people's lives are nothing more than pointlessly frantic activity used as a psychological defense against their own impotence and fear.
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The hardest lesson I've had to learn in my life is that my intelligence is inversely correlated to my humility. The more I thought I knew, the less I actually knew.
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Guys, we spend our whole lives trying to get pussy, so when pussy comes to us, it's like, Whoa, this is amazing! At 27, I thought nothing could be better than that, but at 35, I've come to understand the darker side of it.
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A lot of people think that since I'm drunk in my stories, I must be drunk 24 hours a day. What kind of stupid logic is that? It'd be like if you saw Michael Jordan at a restaurant and were like, Why aren't you in your basketball uniform? I leave out way more than I put in.
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If you don't have a job right now, and you have a computer and a basic intelligence level, I guarantee you can get a great job, paying really well, in less than three months. How? Learn to program.
Tucker Max