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The Big Five publishing companies are dinosaurs trying to survive in a post-meteor world. They won't.
Tucker Max
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Tucker Max
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: September 27
Author
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Atlanta
Georgia
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Survive
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Company
Meteor
Five
Meteors
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More quotes by Tucker Max
I hated being a lawyer and I wanted to like myself and like my job.
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No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.
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I love women, I love alcohol, and I love combining the two. If God invented anything better than drunk sex with a hot girl, he kept it to himself.
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The devil doesn't come dressed in a red cape and pointy horns. He comes as everything you've ever wished for.
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My buddies and I, we all went to law school together, and once we started working in different cities, we all did crazy stuff, and we'd write e-mails to each other about the stuff we would do. And my friends thought my e-mails were really funny and they said, Dude, why don't you put this up on a Web site. You know people would love to read this.
Tucker Max
Hey man, can you talk to dolphins and pilot whales with that huge forehead of yours?
Tucker Max
I'm sorry, but I stand by my decision. I am now a member of the elite club of people that have fought a professional team mascot. You sir, are not in that club.
Tucker Max
I stop paying attention because as much as I love beauty, I hate stupidity, and seeing the two combined pisses me off.
Tucker Max
There are fun nights, there are crazy nights, and then there are those nights that make men legends.
Tucker Max
My writing is authentic, and whatever happens in my life is what I write about.
Tucker Max
I masterbate in the shower. My action figures judge me. Especially the Justice League.
Tucker Max
Opinions are projections.
Tucker Max
In training, there is no winning or losing. There is only learning.
Tucker Max
To get hwat you want out of life, all you really need to do is be honest about it, don't be afraid to go for it, and have fun while you do it -- and you'll eventually get it.
Tucker Max
I laugh at people who say things like 'I'm a good person, I just do bad things.' No, that's not how it works. What you do IS who you are.
Tucker Max
Yinzer: DAMN!! I wish I had your balls! Tucker:I wish you had a breath mint, but I guess we don't always get what we wish for.
Tucker Max
I tell the truth, and truth is the ultimate defense against libel.
Tucker Max
Tell beautiful women they are smart, and smart women they are beautiful.
Tucker Max
If people try to judge you or shame you for doing safe, consensual things that make you happy, I can guarantee you they're bad people.
Tucker Max
The narcissist act is not an act. I actually am a narcissist, very much so. My world revolves around me.
Tucker Max
