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She needed help, but God was in a meeting whenever she rang.

Tom Robbins

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Tom Robbins
Age: 92
Born: 1932
Born: July 22
Author
Autobiographer
Biographer
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
Blowing Rock
North Carolina
Thomas Eugene Robbins
Humorous
Phones
Meetings
Whenever
God
Rang
Needed
Telephones
Help
Perfume
Helping
Meeting

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Maybe most people were fundamentally contradictory. The real people at any rate.
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You know what the game of golf is, don't you? It's basketball for people who can't jump and chess for people who can't think.
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It's hard to say who's a greater threat to the world, an ambitious CEO with a big ad budget or a crafty cleric with an obsolete Bible verse.
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Life is like a stew, you have to stir it frequently, or all the scum rises to the top.
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The price of self-destiny is never cheap, and in certain situations it is unthinkable. But to achieve the marvelous, it is precisely the unthinkable that must be thought.
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Our similarities bring us to a common ground Our differences allow us to be fascinated by each other.
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If it is committed in the name of God or country, there is no crime so heinous that the public will not forgive it.
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I am cheerful. I don't know if I'm happy. There is a difference, you know.
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Live the beauty or your own reality.
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To live fully, one must be free, but to be free one must give up security. Therefore, to live one must be ready to die. How's that for a paradox?
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Outlaws, like lovers, poets, and tubercular composers who cough blood onto piano keys, do their finest work in the slippery rays of the moon.
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Christians, and some Jews, claim we're in the end times, but they've been saying this off and on for more than two thousand years.
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In the beginning was the thing. And one thing led to another.
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The first time that she spread her legs for him it had been like opening her jaws for the dentist.
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At the typewriter you find out who you are.
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Reality is contradictory. And it's paradoxical. If there's any one word -- if you had to pick one word to describe the nature of the universe -- I think that word would be paradox. That's true at the subatomic level, right through sociological, psychological, philosophical levels on up to cosmic levels.
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In Seattle, I soon found that my radical ideas and aesthetic explorations - ideas and explorations that in Richmond, Virginia, might have gotten me stoned to death with hush puppies - were not only accepted but occasionally applauded.
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How can you admire a human who consciously embraces the bland, the mediocre, and the safe rather than risk the suffering that disappointment can bring?
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True stability results when presumed order and presumed disorder are balanced.
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