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I would only read the novels that people classify as 'beach books' if I were being held prisoner and the only alternative was the 'Book of Mormon.'

Tom Robbins

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Tom Robbins
Age: 92
Born: 1932
Born: July 22
Author
Autobiographer
Biographer
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Blowing Rock
North Carolina
Thomas Eugene Robbins
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Mormon
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Prisoner
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More quotes by Tom Robbins

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A sneeze travels at a peak velocity of two hundred miles per hour. A burp, more slowly a fart, slower yet. But a kiss thrown by fingers- its departure is sudden, its arrival ambiguous, and there is no source that can state with authority what speeds are reached in its flight.
Tom Robbins
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You are what you think you eat.
Tom Robbins
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From the outside, my life may look chaotic, but inside I feel like some kind of monk licking an ice cream cone while straddling a runaway horse.
Tom Robbins
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Hold on to your divine blush, your innate rosy magic, or end up brown. Once you're brown, you'll find out you're blue. As blue as indigo. And you know what that means. Indigo. Indigoing. Indigone.
Tom Robbins
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The one thing emphasized in any creative writing course is 'write what you know,' and that automatically drives a wooden stake through the heart of imagination. If they really understood the mysterious process of creating fiction, they would say, 'You can write about anything you can imagine.'
Tom Robbins
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Poetry, the best of it, is lunar and is concerned with the essential insanities. Journalism is solar (there are numerous newspapers named The Sun, none called The Moon) and is devoted to the inessential.
Tom Robbins
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Survival is not important. What matters is how you survive.
Tom Robbins
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True stability results when presumed order and presumed disorder are balanced.
Tom Robbins
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Using words to describe magic is like using a screwdriver to cut roast beef.
Tom Robbins
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Society had a crime problem. It hired cops to attack crime. Now society has a cop problem.
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If complexity doesn't beat you, paradox will.
Tom Robbins
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Who knows how to make love stay? Tell love you are going to the Junior's Deli on Flatbush Avenue in Brooklyn to pick up a cheesecake, and if love stays, it can have half.
Tom Robbins
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The fact is, what I hated in the Church was what I hated in society. Namely, authoritarians. Power freaks. Rigid dogmatists. Those greedy, underloved, undersexed twits who want to run everything. While the rest of us are busy living - busy tasting and testing and hugging and kissing and goofing and growing - they are busy taking over.
Tom Robbins
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Salvador Dali and fifty cents will get you a cup of clock melt.
Tom Robbins
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Philosophers have argued for centuries about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin, but materialists have known all along that it depends on whether they are jitterbugging or dancing cheek to cheek.
Tom Robbins
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It is better to be small, colorful, sexy, careless, and peaceful.
Tom Robbins
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There are two lost continents.... We are one: the lovers.
Tom Robbins
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Intimacy is the principal source of the sugars which this life is sweetened!
Tom Robbins
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Meditation... dissolves the mind. It erases itself. Throws the ego out on its big brittle ass.
Tom Robbins
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We use so much bad language that it forms a barrier between ourselves and the truth.
Tom Robbins