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Be it ever so decadent, there's no place like home.

Tom Lehrer

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Tom Lehrer
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: April 9
Lyricist
Mathematician
Pianist
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
University Teacher
New York City
New York
Thomas Andrew Lehrer
Thomas Lehrer
Decadent
Place
Home
Ever
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More quotes by Tom Lehrer

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Oh we will all fry together when we fry. We'll be french fried potatoes by and by. There will be no more misery When the world is our rotisserie, Yes, we will all fry together when we fry.
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Angels we have heard on High Tell us to go out and Buy.
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My last public performance for money was in 1967. For free, it was 1972, with the exception of two little one-shot, one-song things. But that's just for friends, out of friendship for the people involved, and also because it was fun.
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And although I'm all for freedom of expression and against censorship, there are certain things I'm not willing to go to jail for.
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If the hoods don't get you, the monoxide will.
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Life is like a piano. What you get out of it depends on how you play it.
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Don't drink the water and don't breathe the air!
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I ache for the touch of your lips dear, but much more for the touch of your whips dear.
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I feel that if a person has problems communicating the very least he can do is to shut up.
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They love us everywhere we go. So when in doubt, send the Marines.
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Oh, the Protestants hate the Catholics/ And the Catholics hate the Protestants/ And the Hindus hate the Muslims/ And everybody hates the Jews.
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For there is surely nothing more beautiful in this world than the sight of a lone man facing single-handedly a half a ton of angry pot roast!
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If, after hearing my songs, just one human being is inspired to say something nasty to a friend, or perhaps to strike a loved one, it will all have been worth the while.
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Filth, I'm glad to say, is in the mind of the beholder. When correctly viewed, everything is lewd.
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I would do nightclubs and concerts - particularly concerts, which is mostly what I did - and only people who already agreed with me would show up. People weren't going to come and inadvertently turn on their television set and find this offensive stuff coming out.
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The people who came to hear me perform or to buy my records were not the type who would be offended [by the song 'The Vatican Rag']. But I gather that there were other people who were offended.
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I'm very proud of myself on my, whatever the literacy is, I'm pretentious, totally pretentious. I like to say 'hmm', for example.
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Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
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I didn't feel the need for anonymous affection, for people in the dark applauding. To me, it would be like writing a novel and then getting up every night and reading your novel. Everything I did is on the record and, if you want to hear it, just listen to the record.
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Be careful not to do your good deeds when there's no one watching you.
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