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They love us everywhere we go. So when in doubt, send the Marines.

Tom Lehrer

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Tom Lehrer
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: April 9
Lyricist
Mathematician
Pianist
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
University Teacher
New York City
New York
Thomas Andrew Lehrer
Thomas Lehrer
Love
Marines
Marine
Send
Everywhere
Doubt
Politics

More quotes by Tom Lehrer

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Don't solicit for your sister, it's not nice. Unless you get a good percentage of her price.
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So long, Mom I'm off to drop the bomb So don't wait up for me But while you swelter Down there in your shelter You can see me On your TV
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Bad weather always looks worse through a window.
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In one word he told me the secret of success in mathematics: plagiarize only be sure always to call it . . . research.
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Base eight is just like base ten really, if you're missing two fingers.
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From the three, you then use one to make eight ones. You add those ones to the three, and you get one-three base eight, or, in other words, In base ten you have eleven, and you take away seven. And seven from eleven is four. Now go back to the sixty-fours, you're left with two.
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Filth, I'm glad to say, is in the mind of the beholder. When correctly viewed, everything is lewd.
Tom Lehrer
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The people who came to hear me perform or to buy my records were not the type who would be offended [by the song 'The Vatican Rag']. But I gather that there were other people who were offended.
Tom Lehrer
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I feel that if a person has problems communicating the very least he can do is to shut up.
Tom Lehrer
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I'm very proud of myself on my, whatever the literacy is, I'm pretentious, totally pretentious. I like to say 'hmm', for example.
Tom Lehrer
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Be careful not to do your good deeds when there's no one watching you.
Tom Lehrer
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I went from adolescence to senility, trying to bypass maturity.
Tom Lehrer
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If the hoods don't get you, the monoxide will.
Tom Lehrer
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But in the new (math) approach, the important thing is to understand what you're doing, rather than to get the right answer.
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Some of you may have met mathematicians and wondered how they got that way.
Tom Lehrer
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You can raise welts like nobody else, as we dance to the Masochism Tango.
Tom Lehrer
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Angels we have heard on High Tell us to go out and Buy.
Tom Lehrer
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I've heard it quoted that I was dead. You can't believe anything you read. That was just an off-hand remark somebody picked up, and now it's been quoted and quoted, and therefore misquoted.
Tom Lehrer
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I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!
Tom Lehrer
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Alas, irreverence has been subsumed by mere grossness, at least in the so-called mass media. What we have now - to quote myself at my most pretentious - is a nimiety of scurrility with a concomitant exiguity of taste.
Tom Lehrer