Quote

Disclaimer: If anyone disagrees with anything I say, I am quite prepared to not only retract it, but also to deny under oath I ever said it.

Tom Lehrer

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Tom Lehrer
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: April 9
Lyricist
Mathematician
Pianist
Singer
Singer-Songwriter
University Teacher
New York City
New York
Thomas Andrew Lehrer
Thomas Lehrer
Anyone
Disagree
Also
Preparation
Anything
Humorous
Ever
Insane
Disclaimer
Deny
Disclaimers
Profound
Retract
Prepared
Disagrees
Quite
Oath

More quotes by Tom Lehrer

Image
But in the new (math) approach, the important thing is to understand what you're doing, rather than to get the right answer.
Tom Lehrer
Image
Some of you may have met mathematicians and wondered how they got that way.
Tom Lehrer
Image
Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
Tom Lehrer
Image
I feel that if a person has problems communicating the very least he can do is to shut up.
Tom Lehrer
Image
The audiences like to think that satire is doing something. But, in fact, it is mostly to leave themselves satisfied. Satisfied rather than angry, which is what they should be.
Tom Lehrer
Image
Be it ever so decadent, there's no place like home.
Tom Lehrer
Image
Laughter is involuntary. If it's funny you laugh.
Tom Lehrer
Image
From the three, you then use one to make eight ones. You add those ones to the three, and you get one-three base eight, or, in other words, In base ten you have eleven, and you take away seven. And seven from eleven is four. Now go back to the sixty-fours, you're left with two.
Tom Lehrer
Image
On my income tax 1040 it says 'Check this box if you are blind.' I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away.
Tom Lehrer
Image
Oh, the Protestants hate the Catholics/ And the Catholics hate the Protestants/ And the Hindus hate the Muslims/ And everybody hates the Jews.
Tom Lehrer
Image
Bad weather always looks worse through a window.
Tom Lehrer
Image
I went from adolescence to senility, trying to bypass maturity.
Tom Lehrer
Image
The people who came to hear me perform or to buy my records were not the type who would be offended [by the song 'The Vatican Rag']. But I gather that there were other people who were offended.
Tom Lehrer
Image
Filth, I'm glad to say, is in the mind of the beholder. When correctly viewed, everything is lewd.
Tom Lehrer
Image
For there is surely nothing more beautiful in this world than the sight of a lone man facing single-handedly a half a ton of angry pot roast!
Tom Lehrer
Image
I ache for the touch of your lips dear, but much more for the touch of your whips dear.
Tom Lehrer
Image
And we will all go together when we go. What a comforting fact that is to know. Universal bereavement, An inspiring achievement, Yes, we will all go together when we go.
Tom Lehrer
Image
Don't drink the water and don't breathe the air!
Tom Lehrer
Image
Plagiarize! Plagiarize, Let no one else's work evade your eyes, Remember why the good Lord made your eyes, So don't shade your eyes, But plagiarize, plagiarize, plagiarize... Only be sure always to call it please research.
Tom Lehrer
Image
To me, being funny is more important than making a point, but I don't know. Most politicians are so interested in making points that they don't ... I'd rather be funny myself, and I'd rather listen to somebody with a little sense of humor.
Tom Lehrer