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My mom wanted me to apply to Princeton, cause she just I guess since I was a kid had this dream that I would apply to Princeton, and it was not happening.

Tina Fey

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Tina Fey
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: May 18
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Director
Film Actor
Film Producer
Improviser
Librettist
Screenwriter
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Television Actor
Upper Darby Township
Pennsylvania
Elizabeth Stamatina Tina Fey
Elizabeth Stamatina Fey
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More quotes by Tina Fey

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Anyone who knows me will tell you that I am all about money. I mean, just look how well my line of zodiac-inspired toe rings and homeopathic children's medications are selling on Home Shopping Network.
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After college, I knew I wanted to work in comedy, so the first thing I did was go to where the comedy was. I moved from Charlottesville to Chicago, because that's where The Second City and Improv Olympics are. You have to go wherever you need to go to study what interests you.
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Tracy: Stop eating people's old french fries, little pigeon. Have some self-respect. Don't you know you can fly?
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An interim government was set up in Afghanistan. It included two women, one of whom was Minister of Women's Affairs. Man, who'd she have to show here ankles to to get that job?
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My parents raised me that you never ask people about their reproductive plans. “You don’t know their situation,” my mom would say. I considered it such an impolite question that for years I didn’t even ask myself. Thirty-five turned into forty faster than McDonald’s food turns into cold nonfood.
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The ideal situation for a parent is one that no one has - having a fulfilling job that requires you to work three days a week. It's better for the parents, because they get to spend time with the children and also have a source of pride and achievement - and income - outside the home.
Tina Fey
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It's like being a little kid again, parading around in a nightgown tucked into your underpants, believing it looks terrific.
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I am extremely square and obedient in nature!
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North Korea referred to The Interview as absolutely intolerable and a wanton act of terror. Even more amazing: not the worst review the movie got.
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I'm still technically employed by the National Broadcasting Company.
Tina Fey
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30 Rock is over, so I definitely aspire to write another movie again eventually, will try to pitch something for television again.
Tina Fey
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Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad you could just cry, then cry. It terrifies everyone.
Tina Fey
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This January, Kevin Costner will be honored by the Palm Springs International Film Festival for his contribution to film. This gives Costner just two months to make a contribution to film.
Tina Fey
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If you ever start to feel good about yourself... .... they have this thing called the internet.
Tina Fey
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When hiring, mix Harvard Nerds with Chicago Improvisers and stir.
Tina Fey
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If you’re looking for a spiritual allegory in the style of C.S. Lewis, I guess you could piece something together with Lorne Michaels as a symbol for God and my struggles with hair removal as a metaphor for virtue
Tina Fey
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Confidence is 10 percent hard work and 90 percent delusion, just thinking foolishly that you will be able to do what you want to do
Tina Fey
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I can't believe you recently had a baby. How do you do it? The baby starts to come down...and once that happens you can't-it comes out. Whether you let it or not, the baby comes out. So that's how I did it.
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Pentagon records show that at least 8,000 members of the all-volunteer U.S. Army have deserted since the Iraq war began. Hey, at least somebody has an exit strategy.
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Some people work with a trainer, some people work with a stylist. I work with a celebrity fecalist. A fecalist is basically a person who comes and collects my stools, and then examines them to see if I'm eating right and if I should be drinking more water and what my moods should be.
Tina Fey