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Whenever you see me, I'm on antique quaaludes.
Tina Fey
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Tina Fey
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: May 18
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Director
Film Actor
Film Producer
Improviser
Librettist
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Upper Darby Township
Pennsylvania
Elizabeth Stamatina Tina Fey
Elizabeth Stamatina Fey
Antique
Antiques
Ridiculous
Whenever
More quotes by Tina Fey
It will never be perfect, but perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring on live TV.
Tina Fey
It doesn't matter if it's a school play or a dumb TV show. It's your work. You should care about it so much that people get annoyed with you.
Tina Fey
What Turning Forty Means to Me I need to take my pants off as soon as I get home. I didn't used to have to do that. But now I do.
Tina Fey
I am extremely square and obedient in nature!
Tina Fey
You’re in competition with everyone.
Tina Fey
I am going to dedicate myself, full time, to my day-drinking.
Tina Fey
I never dreamed I would receive the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, mostly because my style is so typically Austrian.
Tina Fey
Yeah, it's tough being smart and sexy, too. I have to say, I'm really not that attractive. Until I met my husband, I could not get a date. I promise you it's true. My husband Jeff Richmond saw a diamond in the rough and took me in.
Tina Fey
I don't like my feet. I'm not crazy about anybody's feet. But I have flat feet.
Tina Fey
The eyes are the window to where the soul is supposed to be.
Tina Fey
Sometimes you want to have a very productive Saturday to feel that you are in control of your life, which of course you are not.
Tina Fey
Being a mom has made me so tired. And so happy.
Tina Fey
My parents raised me that you never ask people about their reproductive plans. “You don’t know their situation,” my mom would say. I considered it such an impolite question that for years I didn’t even ask myself. Thirty-five turned into forty faster than McDonald’s food turns into cold nonfood.
Tina Fey
There are a couple of things I want to impart to ladies who want to be in comedy: One, you don’t have to be weird or be quirky to get your job done. And two, comedy skill is not sexually transmittable. You do not have to sleep with a comedian to learn what you’re doing. Male comedians will not like that advice, but it is the truth.
Tina Fey
A new poll showed that 66% of Americans think President Bush is doing a poor job handling the war in Iraq and the remaining 34% think that Adam and Eve rode dinosaurs to church.
Tina Fey
The Supreme Court is expected to rule this week whether banning cross burning by groups like the Klu Klux Klan violates the first amendment. The outcome could affect the entertainment at Trent Lott's Christmas party.
Tina Fey
If you want to be a screenwriter, take an acting class to get a sense of what you're asking actors to do. Learning other skills will help you communicate with people and respect what they do.
Tina Fey
Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad you could just cry, then cry. It terrifies everyone.
Tina Fey
I would not trade any of these features for anybody else’s. I wouldn’t trade the small thin-lipped mouth that makes me resemble my nephew. I wouldn’t even trade the acne scar on my right cheek, because that recurring zit spent more time with me in college than any boy ever did.
Tina Fey
Television is a runaway train that you have to get on for nine months of the year. But at the same time, it has a wonderful immediacy.
Tina Fey