Quote

Nothing's as easy as it is on a sitcom. Issues that we take care of in 20 minutes on the show can stretch out over years in real families.

Tim Allen

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Tim Allen
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: June 13
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Racing Automobile Driver
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Denver
Colorado
Timothy Alan Dick
Care
Sitcom
Nothing
Stretch
Take
Families
Real
Minutes
Years
Issues
Show
Easy
Shows

More quotes by Tim Allen

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Men aren't men until they can get to Sears by themselves.
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I have irrational fears, and they all go back to losing my father as a kid. I've never gotten over it.
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When you're 6 or 7, your father becomes this wonderful presence in your life. I really responded to my father. And then, the very moment I realized that I loved him unconditionally, that life was going to be great just because he was in it, he was gone.
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Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.
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My comedy is not mine. It's a gift. I'm not that smart.
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Jill : What causes sibling rivalry? Tim : Having more than one kid!
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In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.
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I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that's a good thing.
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I may go back and spice it up with a little bit of the tool stuff and grunting and all that that I know so well. But it feels like I'm rehashing old material. And some of my audiences like that. So I'm there to entertain. I'm not there to make a political statement or anything like that. I'm there to entertain.
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Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.
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When I went to jail, reality hit so hard that it took my breath away, took my stance away, took my strength away. I was there buck naked, humiliated, sitting in my own crap and urine - this is a metaphor. My ego had run off. Your ego is the biggest coward.
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If you want to condemn yourself for the mistakes you've made, let's be fair, that means you've got to congratulate yourself for all the good things you've done. It's okay to say, God, I wish I'd done this yeah, but I did do that. Then it kind of balances out.
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But separate a man from his car - that's inhuman.
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I have always enjoyed do-it-yourself projects, .. Being in a position to actually help design and bring tools to market is an incredible opportunity. Being able to fund charities as a result is phenomenal.
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My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
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While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously.
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Comedy is the ultimate anarchist.
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The big advantage to playing the Venetian in Las Vegas - where it's a beautiful theater - is that unlike other places, even many other nice venues, I can do a set and lighting cues, I can put on a real show. I can dress up, wear a tux.
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I have a thing for tools.
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I know it sounds odd, but I want to make a Rolex-quality screwdriver.
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