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Everything's happened to me. Nothing can happen to me now.

Tig Notaro

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Tig Notaro
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: March 24
Comedian
Director
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Writer
Podcaster
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Jackson
Mississippi
Everything
Nothing
Happen
Happened
Happens

More quotes by Tig Notaro

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I start crying when certain things come up, certain memories, certain feelings, and it's intense. But I think it's good for me - and therapeutic.
Tig Notaro
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It's not the child's responsibility to teach the parent who they are. It's the parent's responsibility to learn who the child is.
Tig Notaro
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I talk about airplanes and things like that while my scars are on clear view.
Tig Notaro
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I think my brain just has a natural way of going to what would be the most insane thing, the least likely option.
Tig Notaro
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When anything huge happens to me, I always think, this isn't my moment, this is a moment.
Tig Notaro
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As soon as I say I'm from Texas people say, Oh, I'm sure the school was horrible and they picture me wearing some barrel and suspenders and people are bucktoothed and ignoring me. But that's not the case. I just had zero interest. I wanted to finish my research in the woods or play guitar or go have a cigarette.
Tig Notaro
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I'm always going to do whatever I think is funniest. If something's dark, I'll do it. If it's a sock puppet, if it's a stool, I'll do it.
Tig Notaro
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I didn't know what my fate was as far as being alive.
Tig Notaro
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I didn't know whether I'd be attractive to anybody.
Tig Notaro
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I love devastating movies, documentaries and hummingbirds (yes, in that order).
Tig Notaro
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I didn't have an interest in school at all and was getting in trouble all the time.
Tig Notaro
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I love drama - I would say more than I even love comedy - but I like in One Mississippi that I can go from a very moving moment to a Willy Wonka tube up my ass. I like the silliness as much as I like drama.
Tig Notaro
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When I got sick, it threw everything off course.
Tig Notaro
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The ideal length of time for sex to last is the entire relationship, breaking only for snacks.
Tig Notaro
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In standup, you don't have anything near you except a microphone.
Tig Notaro
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I always wonder, aside from even my name, what if my parents never split up? What if my mother never died? It swirls in my head all the time.
Tig Notaro
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In movies, you just see somebody close their eyes, and you go on to the next scene.
Tig Notaro
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When I announced I had cancer on stage, it was my brain leaping to that insane moment of, There's no way I could start a show saying, 'Hi, I have cancer!' And also for me to have these scars, and then think, Oh my gosh, what if I did stand-up and not even acknowledge that my shirt was off, or that I have scars.
Tig Notaro
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When I couldn't get ahold of cigarettes, I'd roll coffee grounds into typing paper and smoke that and then vomit.
Tig Notaro
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I was really into music. I started playing guitar also when I was nine. I wanted to be in the Beatles, even though John Lennon died the year I got a guitar and the Beatles broke up before I was born.
Tig Notaro