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There are two golden rules for an orchestra: start together and finish together. The public doesn't give a damn what goes on in between.

Thomas Beecham

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Thomas Beecham
Age: 81 †
Born: 1879
Born: April 29
Died: 1961
Died: March 8
Conductor
Sir Thomas Beecham
2nd Baronet
Give
Musical
Together
Rules
Togetherness
Music
Goes
Conductor
Giving
Public
Orchestra
Start
Composer
Funny
Finish
Doesn
Damn
Two
Golden

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Composers and musicians have always starved and, as this is a sentimental country, we think the tradition should be continued.
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A soprano in Massenet's Don Quixote complained that she had missed her entry in the aria, because Mr. Challiapin always dies too soon. Madam, you must be profoundly in error, said Sir Thomas, No operatic star has yet died half soon enough for me.
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It is quite untrue that British people don't appreciate music. They may not understand it but they absolutely love the noise it makes.
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Elgar's first symphony is the musical equivalent of St Pancras Railway Station.
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Without question the most unpopular medium of musical sound in the world.
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The English may not like music, but they absolutely love the noise it makes.
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The trouble with women in an orchestra is that if they're attractive it will upset my players and if they're not it will upset me.
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Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure to thousands and all you can do is scratch it.
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If she is attractive, I can't perform with her if she is not, then I won't.
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Great music is that which penetrates the ear with facility and leaves the memory with difficulty. Magical music never leaves the memory.
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The sound of the harpsichord resembles that of a bird-cage played with toasting-forks.
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I find brass bands have a melancholy sound. All right out of doors, of course - fifty miles away. Like bagpipes, they turn what had been a dream into a public nuisance.
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In the first movement alone, I took note of six pregnancies and at least four miscarriages.
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The sound of a harpsichord - two skeletons copulating on a tin roof in a thunderstorm.
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No woman is worth the loss of a night's sleep.
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Composers should write tunes that chauffeurs and errand boys can whistle.
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The British like any kind of music so long as it is loud.
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The bagpipes sound exactly the same when you have finished as when you started
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At a rehearsal I let the orchestra play as they like. At the concert I make them play as I like.
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I have just been all round the world and have formed a very poor opinion of it.
Thomas Beecham