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Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Think
Mile
Thinking
Marathon
Racist
Miles
Hundred
Happy
Running
Meters
Always
Meter

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Nanny Ogg knew how to start spelling 'banana', but didn't know how you stopped.
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You are very clever, said the old man shyly. I would like to eat your brains, one day.
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Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one.
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And then you bit onto them, and learned once again that Cut-me-own-Throat Dibbler could find a use for bits of an animal that the animal didn't know it had got. Dibbler had worked out that with enough fried onions and mustard people would eat anything.
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Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH,' the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.
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Cats will amusingly tolerate humans only until someone comes up with a tin opener that can be operated with a paw.
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One person is nothing. Two people are a nation.
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Sergeant Colon of the Ankh-Morpork City Guard was on duty. He was guarding the Brass Bridge, the main link between Ankh and Morpork. From theft. When it came to crime prevention, Sergeant Colon found it safest to think big.
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A true beanie should have a propellor on the top.
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Preston, I don't think this creature could ever find its way into your head. Quite apart from anything else, it seems pretty crowded and complicated to me.
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They say that the prospect of being hanged in the morning concentrates a man's mind wonderfully unfortunately, what the mind inevitably concentrates on is that, in the morning, it will be in a body that is going to be hanged.
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Just call in at the torturer on your way out. See when he can fit you in.
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There have been times, lately, when I dearly wished that I could change the past. Well, I can’t, but I can change the present, so that when it becomes the past it will turn out to be a past worth having.
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Perhaps it would be simpler if you just did what you're told and didn't try to understand things.
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Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point MY POINT EXACTLY.
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HOROSCOPE: Today is a good time for making new friends. A good deed may have unforeseen consequences. Don’t upset any druids. You will soon be going on a very strange journey. Your lucky food is small cucumbers. People pointing knives at you are probably up to no good. PS, we really mean it about the druids.
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Look out! He's got a daisy!
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The singers all loathe the sight of one another, the chorus despises the singers, they both hate the orchestra, and everyone fears the conductor the staff on one prompt side won't talk to the staff on the opposite prompt side, the dancers are all crazed from hunger in any case.
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Quit while you're a head, that's what I say.
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Personally, I think the best motto for an educational establishment is: 'Or Would You Rather Be a Mule?'
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