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Priests were metal-reinforced overshoes. They saved your soles. This is an Assassin joke.
Terry Pratchett
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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
Priests
Joke
Saved
Soles
Jokes
Assassin
Reinforced
Assassins
Metal
Metals
More quotes by Terry Pratchett
Mere animals couldn’t possibly manage to act like this. You need to be a human being to be really stupid.
Terry Pratchett
Death was standing behind a lectern, poring over a map. He looked at Mort as if he wasn’t entirely there. You haven't heard of the bayof mante, have you? He said. “No, sir,” said Mort. Famous shipwreck there. “Was there?” there will be, said Death, if I can find the damn place.
Terry Pratchett
There isn't a way things should be. There's just what happens, and what we do.
Terry Pratchett
The pen is mightier than the sword ... if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp.
Terry Pratchett
Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH,' the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.
Terry Pratchett
The Assassin moved quietly from roof to roof until he was well away from the excitement around the Watch House. His movements could be called cat-like, except that he did not stop to spray urine up against things.
Terry Pratchett
The first draft is just you telling yourself the story.
Terry Pratchett
Don't do anything I wouldn't do, if you ever find anything I wouldn't do.
Terry Pratchett
It was also a room full of books and made of books. There was no actual furniture this is to say, the desk and chairs were shaped out of books. It looked as though many of them were frequently referred to, because they lay open with other books used as bookmarks.
Terry Pratchett
Death strode away, stopped, and came back. He pointed a skeletal finger at The Duck Man. WHY, he said, ARE YOU WALKING AROUND WITH THAT DUCK? What duck? AH. SORRY.
Terry Pratchett
They were also slightly less intelligent than he was. This is a quality you should always pray for in your would-be murderer.
Terry Pratchett
They may have been ugly. They may have been evil. But when it came to poetry in motion, the Things had all the grace and coordination of a deck-chair.
Terry Pratchett
In the end the problem isn't that you have the wrong sort of government for the People, but that you have the wrong sort of People.
Terry Pratchett
If it wasn't for the fun and money, I really don't know why I'd bother.
Terry Pratchett
Sometimes the truth is arrived at by adding all the little lies together and deducting them from the totality of what is known.
Terry Pratchett
Nigel gave the lamp a cautious buff and small smoking red letters appeared in the air. Hi, Nigel read aloud, Do not put down the lamp because your custom is important to us. Please leave a wish after the tone and, very shortly, it will be our command. In the meantime, have a nice eternity.
Terry Pratchett
For an author, the nice characters aren't much fun. What you want are the screwed up characters. You know, the characters that are constantly wondering if what they are doing is the right thing, characters that are not only screwed up but are self-tapping screws. They're doing it for themselves.
Terry Pratchett
- DON’T WORRY, IT WON’T BE FOREVER. - Good. - IT MAY SEEM LIKE FOREVER.
Terry Pratchett
They'd smash up the world if they thought it would make a pretty noise.
Terry Pratchett
Sometimes I think a man could wander across the disc all his life and not see everything there is to see,' said Twoflower. 'And now it seems there are lots of other worlds as well. When I think I might die without seeing a hundredth of all there is to see it makes me feel,' he paused, then added, 'well, humble, I suppose. And very angry, of course.
Terry Pratchett
