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Things like crowns had a troublesome effect on clever folk it was best to leave all the reigning to the kind of people whose eyebrows met in the middle when they tried to think. In a funny sort of way, they were much better at it.

Terry Pratchett

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Terry Pratchett
Age: 66 †
Born: 1948
Born: April 28
Died: 2015
Died: March 12
Author
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Beaconsfield
Buckinghamshire
Terence David John Terry Pratchett
Terence David John Pratchett
Sir Terry Pratchett
Sir Terence David John Pratchett
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Best
Folks
Reigning
People
Better
Tried
Troublesome
Much
Whose
Eyebrows
Kind
Effects
Crowns
Way
Leave
Folk
Things
Sort
Clever
Think
Middle
Effect
Thinking
Funny
Mets

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These weren't cheap modern books these were books bound in leather, and not just leather, but leather from clever cows who had given their lives for literature after a happy existence in the very best pastures.
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Yes, sir, thank you, sir, and I wouldn’t trust me one little inch, sir. I knows a bad one when I sees them. I have a mirror.
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He sighed. It had come to this. He was a responsible authority, and people could use terms like core values at him with impunity.
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The point of page one is to make people turn to page two and if at the end of the book people think that the book was good value for money, you have achieved something, because if you haven't achieved those things you're not going to achieve the other thing.
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A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.
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This wasn't food - it was what food became if it had been good and gone to food heaven.
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...inside every old person is a young person wondering what happened.
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Mr Lipwig, there's a lady in the hall to see you and we've thanked her for not smoking three times and she's still doing it!
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So much paperwork to read! So much paperwork to push away! So much paperwork to pretend he hadn't received and that might have been eaten by gargoyles.
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The librarians were mysterious. It was said they could tell what book you needed just by looking at you, and they could take your voice away with a word.
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Probably the last sound heard before the Universe folded up like a paper hat would be someone saying, What happens if I do this?
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I'd like to walk on the moon (and return).
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A Duke couldn't have the arse hanging out of his trousers when meeting foreign diplomats. Actually even plain old Sam Vimes never had the arse hanging out of his trousers, either, but no one would have actually started a war if he had.
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Right! Right! You can get there! I can get there! You're a natural at counting to two! I'm a nat'ral at counting to two! If you can count to two, you can count to anything! If I can count to two, I can count to anything! And then the world is your mollusc! My mollusc! What's a mollusc?
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As far as I'm concerned, I'm a writer who's writing books, and therefore, I don't want to die. You'd miss the end of the book, wouldn't you? You can't die with an unfinished book.
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What's the good of having mastery over cosmic balance and knowing the secrets of fate if you can't blow something up?
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They were also slightly less intelligent than he was. This is a quality you should always pray for in your would-be murderer.
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One day I'll work out what it is you are saying, my lad, and then you'll be in trouble.
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In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.
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